The Time After
by 0TheLengths
Summary: Voldemort died just a few hours ago, and the world rejoiced for The-Boy-Who-Lived, but Harry didn't care at all.  H/Hr This is my first fic ever so please give me some feedback! Rating for language.


**Authors Note: Well, I've never even came close to attempting anything even close to fanfiction, so this is terrible, also considering I haven't wrote fiction in years and also I have no idea where I want to go with this, or whats in store, but ANYWAY I hope you harmonians enjoy it, Any tips whatsoever would be GREATLY appreciatied!**

**Chapter 1: Doubts**

"From the moment you left, I knew."

"Knew what?"

"That you'd come back."

"Ha, I wish I'd have known that, how on earth could you have possibly known that?"

"I don't know, the idea of you not being here just... I couldn't wrap my head around it, okay?"

Harry sat in silence.

"Well, yeah, of course it's okay! I ju-"

"Look Harry, I just had a feeling, I didn't _know_per say, I just had a feeling."

Harry was quiet once more.

"Thanks Hermione, it's comforting to know that you believed in me still."

"Harry don't play dumb, you know that I always have and I always will _believe in you_as cheesy as it sounds."

"Then it's still comforting, even more so." Harry said with a smile.

"Then I'm glad, I'm off to say goodnight to Ron then to bed. It's been a long day. Do yourself a favor and sleep somewhere a little more quiet for a while and don't come back until you're well and rested." Hermione said. "But don't take so long that you start to worry me!" She added.

"I won't, goodnight Hermione." Harry said smiling.

"Goodnight Harry."

Harry watched her walk towards the Gryffindor common room which was still very much alive and abuzz with the defeat of the Dark Lord happening mere hours was jealous of their ability to revel in the goodness of the day for just a few hours until the sadness of the day sunk they remembered the ones they lost. But to Harry that was all that consumed his mind, now that Hermione had left. What if she had died? Harry couldn't help but wonder. In the back of his mind he thought that everything he had done in his entire life would've been worthless if he hadn't been able to keep Hermione, and Ron for that matter, alive.

Even that tragic thought wasn't enough to keep his mind off the death of Fred, Remus, Tonks, and all the others that had died that night and in years prior. It was all for him, and yet when it finally came down to it, when he thought he was going to die, he felt that this would atone for it, he would save the lives of millions of others, and no one else was going to die for him, he would die- well, he would die for himself really.

He would die to prove to the wizarding world that he was the hero they needed, the one to show them that everyone who died due to voldemort didn't die in vain, that if it meant that even the hero himself had to die, then they surely didn't die for nothing if he would die for the same cause. To teach them all that death wasn't the be all end all of all things, to teach them that death couldn't control their lives like Voldemort wanted it to.

But he didn't get that chance. No. Instead he came back, like Hermione knew he would. He stayed alive, he didn't prove anything except that was a hero, but not the one they needed. If in 200 years the next Voldemort came around and the world didn't have a "Harry Potter" a "Boy-Who-Lived" a "Chosen One" what would they do? They would be too busy being afraid to realize that any of them could do what Harry did, because Harry was mortal! He died in the end!

But no, no he didn't. He lived and was forever eternalized as the savior of the Wizarding World.

"Fuck this."

Harry thought if Hermione wanted him to go somewhere quiet, he would go somewhere quiet, somewhere so quiet that noone would hear him ever again, somewhere where he could be the symbol he always wanted to be.

* * *

><p>As Harry walked out the main gate of Hogwarts he felt nothing, not the elation of being free from Voldemorts rule, not the compassion or love that so many now felt for one another knowing they could live long enough for their love to grow, Harry was fairly certain that Ron and Hermione were feeling this exact way right now, thinking about how they're probably together right now huddled by a fire, just holding each other considering their relationship finally blossomed in the middle of the final battle, right next to Harry. Harry didn't feel even the slightest twinge of satisfaction knowing that he just saved millions of lives. He felt nothing, it was all he could allow himself to feel, if he let his mental constitution slip all he would feel is the jealousy he felt back inside Hogwarts.<p>

Harry's feet continued to march until he reached the chasm next to Hogwarts that the battle had created, the one that him and Voldemort had fought in merely hours earlier. A very large and deep chasm. It was this way that Harry had decided he wanted to kill himself, what did he have to live for? Ron had Hermione, Hermione had Ron, the Weasleys had each other, Sirius, Dumbledore, Lupin, and even Snape now we're all dead. Ginny would be fine, she would get over it eventually, she would snap out of her idolization of Harry, Harry knew it would be better for her this way, not that Harry didn't necessarily like her, he just didn't feel the connection because he knew she only liked him because he was the Chosen One. He didn't want her to finally realize what Harry had realized, that he was really a loser who had nothing left.

Harry took the invisibility cloak from the bag he brought with him and slipped it over himself then cast a fastening charm on it so it wouldn't fall off when he jumped. "This way they can't find the body." Harry thought. Harry knew he could simply Avada Kedavra himself, but that seemed to easy, he had already died once that way, and frankly he was afraid it wouldnt work.

Just then a tawny owl with a letter in its beak began fluttering around the area Harry was in looking extrememly disoriented and confused. So Harry took off the cloak for a second, then the owl hooted a sigh of relief and dropped a letter at Harry's feet. Sure enough the letter was addressed to him, and he recognized the handwriting immediately.

_Dear Harry,_

_I know you just left, but I wasn't sure where you were going to go, I assumed Grimmauld Place, but I didn't know for sure so I just told the owl to find you, so whenever you get this letter (which I hope is soon!) Just know that I think you're the most incredible person I've ever met. Everything you did tonight should go down into a history book, and I'm sure it will! I also wanted to say that I think the only reason I had a "feeling" you were going to come back is that I refused to accept the other option, because a world without Harry is not something I ever want to experience! I also wanted to thank you for_ _kinda making my life everything that is today! I owe everything to you Harry! I might've died first year if you hadn't came to save me from that Troll! All these incredible and incredibly scary experiences and all my friendships and relationships all relate back to you Harry. So essentially what I'm saying is, my life would be nowhere without you Harry. Thank you._

Thankyouthankyouthankyou!

_Love,_

_Hermione_

P.s. Come back sooner rather than later!

* * *

><p>Harry stood there for quite some time. But she had Ron! Why wasn't this letter addressed to Ron! He had been so close, to everything being over, now that Voldemort was gone, Harry could care for himself, and apparently to Harry that meant ending his life, but Hermione had just come in and ruined it. Why wasn't she cuddling with him by the fireplace! Why was she writing him a letter right after talking to him in person! Why didn't she say all of this then, because Harry might've been able to get it over it by now and still go through with this!<p>

But thats not how it happened, and Harry knew he couldn't go through with it. So with all the charms and enchantments and everything on Hogwarts relatively destroyed Harry tried to apparate, but unfortunately this still didn't work. So he had to walk out into Hogsmeade the old fashioned way until it was safe to apparate.

While he was walking he got to thinking about the first trip to Hogsmeade, the one he wasn't allowed to go on, until he snuck out. "Maybe that was when it all started?" Harry began to wonder. Is that when their fire began? They had always hated each other before... Who was he kidding it still seemed like they hated each other up until about 4 hours ago. But still maybe that little amount of time alone, without Harry there to intrude on them, they realized that their friendship might be a little more than "friendship."

"Why am I thinking about this?" Harry said aloud this time.

Harry continued to walk, lost entirely in thought. Trying to figure out when and why Ron and Hermione began. It was clear as day to everyone that Ron had something for Hermione, but he was just so much of an ass to her that he never thought anything would ever happen between them. That's not to say Harry thought Ron was an ass, he was his best friend after all, he was just an ass to Hermione. They just didn't get along! Whoever decided that opposites attract was just looking for a way to make their failing relationship work.

Harry stopped and realized he had been walking for long enough to be able to apparate, so that's what he did. The dusty old bedroom of Grimmauld Place was the perfect thing for Harry right now. One would assume that as soon as his head hit that pillow, he would fall asleep. But he didn't. He- couldn't. He closed his eyes and there was her smile. He cleared his mind but could still hear her laugh.

Harry shot up. "Snap out of this man!" He shouted. "What the hell is happening to me!" As he closed his eyes once more this time he saw himself, in the department of mysteries unable to move through fear of Hermione being dead, then he saw himself flying on buckbeak with Hermione's arms wrapped tight around his stomach, then he saw her lying frozen in the hospital bed, then cornered by a troll, his mind couldn't stop racing between every memory he had with Hermione, but it finally settled on one, he had just left a date with Cho that had gone terribly, and saw Hermione sitting with Rita Skeeter and Luna, and it was upon thinking of this moment that Harry realized, Hermione- was beautiful.

I can't even believe what I'm seeing... Her hair falling over her forehead and framing her smile so perfectly it looked like someone had painted it, she's glowing! When she smiles I could swear to god she glows. She looking at me! What do I do1? Come on you stupid tongue say something, say a word! Oh no she looks confused! I'm sorry Hermione I want to say something! I do! But I can't open my mouth! Oh god please don't think I'm a freak, that's the last thing in the world I want! Wait, why is she getting up? We haven't even talked about why you wanted me to come here! She's leaving... Wait! She's smiling again! It looks like she's coming towards me! Or... she's walking right by me towards... Ron. RON. NO! I'm not letting you have her this time! I'm sorry Ron but I have to do this.

As Harry reached for Hermiones hand to pull her around and kiss her, he sat up and the sun in his eyes brought him back to reality. But before he knew it, he couldn't remember what he had dreamt about. All he knew was that Hermione was there, and so was Ron. A fairly typical dream in his eyes. He couldn't remember that in his sleep he finally realized what's been in front of him for all this time.


End file.
